Every leader supervisor, coach, parent and member of the team was told of the value of giving positive feedback. We've heard reasons. We have heard we do not do enough. We learned all the fundamentals to give you positive feedback with success: to make timely, specific performance, and giving positive feedback consider sharing it publicly.
All this is good advice, but is below the mark, if we want to make a lasting difference in the long-term self-image, confidence, and performance of others. In short, if you want to give positive feedback, consider doing more to tell people how you feel, consider writing.
Why write
Here are three reasons why written feedback is so valuable.
1. E 'unusual. While most of us give (and receive) far too little positive feedback to begin with, who receives it in writing is even more rare. The time needed to train our thoughts and write them down to the receiver shows how valuable and important feedback is.
2. Can be saved. verbal comments can be preserved only in the mind of the receiver. So I've had people tell me things that I remember very beautiful, and in some cases can also take the exact position that I'm told. But our memories can fail, and these events can only be lost among the millions of moments in our lives. Not so with something in writing. Not only can the thoughts and comments to be retained, but you can bet that in many cases they will be saved ... for a very long time.
3. It will be reviewed and then reinforced. verbal praise is shared and enjoyed the receiver, but I do not think many people will stop the person giving the feedback and say, "Would you say that again please?" Quite the opposite for the hand written note. It will be read at least twice at the beginning, and if the feedback is significant, perhaps several times more in the coming days - and often well beyond.
Some ways to do
It 'really as simple as pick up a pen and write from the heart, genuine comments of another human being. Here are some ways to get into the habit of giving people a positive feedback in writing.
1. Send a letter. Write a letter to someone quickly, does not take long. Does not need to be formal, just needs to honestly say that the other person how you feel. Do not delay, just write it.
2. I like it. I learned from Zig Ziglar. He used to (and perhaps still does) that produces small electrodes used this sentence stem to make it easier to give some positive feedback. You have been printed with "I Like You Because" was then more lines for you to enter your note. I used this idea for many years in a variety of settings with great success. Create your pad just like this on your computer, or start with a sheet of paper or index. Using this sentence starter can help you get started (and help you seek and find) the behaviors that you want to praise.
3. Thank you notes. An extension for written comments is the hand written thank you note. Most of us could write more thank you notes to us, and serve as a recognition of what someone has done for us, but also serve as positive feedback. Commit to writing more thank you cards, or with the addition of a feedback bit 'more to those notes that are written.
4. Send an e-mail. This can be a letter in the mail, or a rapid response to an update of the project, say to someone who thought their approach was good, or you appreciate the way they're handling something. While the handwritten note is hard to beat, e-mail will be saved and re-read too. Do not underestimate the value of a report of three or four line email.
I could tell how significant written comments has been both for me and those I know. I could tell stories of notes held for years and reread often. I could tell of people who said that some encouragement handwritten supported their confidence and helped them in difficult times and has contributed mightily to their success.
You probably know some of these stories as well - which means you know that my assumption is correct - that the written praise can be extremely powerful. Since we know that is important, and we know who will be appreciated, then it is our responsibility as leaders, teachers, parents and siblings ... as people ... to give feedback to others in this way.
I bet as you read these words you thought at least one person with whom you could share a positive reinforcement in writing. Since you know who he is, and what to say, and now you've mentioned the impact that could have acted, you have no other choice.
Write to notice it immediately.
You'll be glad you did, and so will the recipient. And who knows, you can change another person's life forever.